Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
