We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
COCAINE IS GR8
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize