K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
