Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
