guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize
