My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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