Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
