you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
