Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
my poor anus
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
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