I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I party with great urgency now.
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