Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
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