I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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