super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
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