the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I fill condoms, not promises.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Randomize
