My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
