I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
