there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize