i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
