I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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