I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize