North Korea, Best Korea!
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Randomize
