After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
