omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
