I'll bet she douches with gravy.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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