I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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