I'm really into asian looking animals
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
