grandma shit on top of the toilet
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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