Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
