Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
