Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I have feelings that need drinking.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
