ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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