he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
