Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
