So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
and i looked up. we had an audience...
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I said "one day" and that day is not today
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