I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
