The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
