if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
