Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
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