Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize