HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
