there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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