He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I AM VODKA MAN
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Randomize
