Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I deserve this hangover.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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