Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
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