i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
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