i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
