If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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