so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
