Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
