Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I can't put those talents on a resume
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
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