he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
